The Dark Orb of Corrupted Wishes

[Don Vecta]

Granted. Now you are the most wanted white collar criminal of the FBI.


I wish I had lived in the 70's, have an afro and being funky~!

[Kei]

Granted. You are now in the 70s shining funky kool with your funky afro do. Quite unfortunately, you are so funky that you got yourself hitched with multiple women during the era of free love. Fun while it lasted but unfortunatly the saying goes: Condoms are for sailors. Going by such principles you decided to do all your funky business the old fashion unprotected way. You then come up with a huge case of HIV and learned that your first funky business was actually with a man. You then look at the ceiling in mind numbing horror while asking yourself: how you could not have noticed the clues to the truth while you two were getting tender with the whip?

I wish StarCraft 2 would be finished already.

[RedHurricane24]

We're doing this again? Fuck it.

Granted, but it's banned by the ESRB.

I wish I had SamShoSen.

[OrochiLeonaUK]

Granted. But it's now "Quiz SamShoShen"
Japanese text only. Runs on DOSBox.

I wish my washing machine would hurry up and finish my laundry.

[RedHurricane24]

Granted. Enjoy your brand new stains on your laundry courtesy of your washer.

I wish that this winter never ends.

[Don Vecta]

Granted. Welcome to a new ice age. Human population and most of wildlife has been reduced dramatically and now it's possible to ice skate over the shores of Hawaii (of course, maritime transportation has been fucked forever as well).


I wish I could lose weight easily and regain a healthy standard of weight.

[Kei]

Granted, now you can control your weight to maintain a steady state of health. No matter how much you eat, your body has the ability to stay in shape. A nearby scientist observes the miracle and decides to call the secret service to abduct you for research. You then spend the rest of your days in a cell that no one but a few researchers know about. The break of day never reaches your skin again.

I wish tamagochis were in the trend again.

[RedHurricane24]

Granted. Enjoy being plagued by tamagotchixGirl bestiality fantasies. With extra fur for their yiffing pleasure.

I wish Dudley's VA was changed.

[PureYeti]

Granted now his VA is a stereotype black american

I wish I pass my math test today

[Kei]

Granted. You get 50% on your math test.

I wish I had more KOF 98 players where I am.

[Don Vecta]

Granted. All of them have shitty level and are mostly button mashers. No point in playing with them cuz you simply won't get a challenge from them.


I wish there's a hot, cool trance club here in Guangzhou. I'm sick of their shitty progressive house music clubs with mediocre DJ's!

[OrochiLeonaUK]

Granted. Everyone's a fucking trendy poser and all the DJ's are celebrities like Paris Hilton. Plus the drinks are overpriced and they forgot to install a fire exit.
Enjoy your DEATH TRAP.

I wish I hadnt run out of coffee

[RedHurricane24]

Granted, now you never run out of coffee, you have it to your heart's content. But all the leftover coffee quickly builds up acidic levels that leaves many holes in your stomach, severely ruining your digestive tract, to the mere point of drinking water is the only viable, yet excruciating way to nourish your body. Enjoy being fucked in the gut.

I wish I could find the guy who made me crash my bike so I can beat him up.

[Eddie]

Granted but once you start wailing on him you figure out he is some jackass Lawyer with strong ties to the police he then proceeds to sue your ass and later put you in the most hardcore prison ever where for starters you'll be gangbanged in the shower and passed around like a sex-toy with no kind of lubrification and later ... well you don't wanna know what comes next. Enjoy the long buttsechs marathons. >=D

Wish I weren't so lazy at times.

[Don Vecta]

(lol i'm fucking loving the creativity of the corrupted wishes, keep on going)


Granted. Now you are in a permanent state of hyperactivity that will put your nervous system running like the Orient Express. You've become unable to sleep and slowly but gradually you arein the verge of dying of a cardiac arrest due of hyperstimulation.


I wish someone asks me more questions in the Vectadamus thread. Nobody needs clarity anymore?